Smart Indian Boy in US College March 20, 2008
Posted by koky in : Education, Jokes , add a commentIt was the first day of a school in USA and a new Indian student named Chandrasekhar Subramanian entered the fourth grade.
The teacher said, ‘Let’s begin by reviewing some American History.
Who said ‘Give me Liberty , or give me Death’?
She saw a sea of blank faces, except for Chandrasekhar, who had his hand up:
‘Patrick Henry, 1775′ he said.
‘Very good!’
Who said ‘Government of the People, by the People, for the People, shall not perish from the Earth?’
Again, no response except from Chandrasekhar.
‘Abraham Lincoln, 1863′ said Chandrasekhar.
The teacher snapped at the class, ‘Class, you should be ashamed. Chandrasekhar, who is new to our country, knows more! About its history than you do.’
She heard a loud whisper: ‘Fuck the Indians,’
‘Who said that?’ she demanded.
Chandrasekhar put his hand up.
‘General Custer, 1862.’
At that point, a student in the back said, ‘I’m gonna puke.’
The teacher glares around and asks ‘All right! Now, who said that?’
Again, Chandrasekhar says, ‘George Bush to the Japanese Prime Minister, 1991.’
Now furious, another student yells, ‘Oh yeah? Suck this!’
Chandrasekhar jumps out of his chair waving his hand and shouts to the teacher , ‘Bill Clinton, to Monica Lewinsky, 1997!’
Now with almost mob hysteria someone said ‘You little shit. If you say anything else, I’ll kill you.’
Chandrasekhar frantically yells at the top of his voice, ‘ Michael Jackson to the child witnesses testifying against him- 2004..’
The teacher fainted.
And as the class gathered around the teacher on the floor, someone said, ‘Oh shit, we’re fucked!’
And Chandrasekhar said quietly, I think it was George Bush, Iraq , 2007.’
Smart kids with great answers January 18, 2008
Posted by koky in : Education , add a commentA 1st grade school teacher had twenty-six students in her class. She presented each child in her classroom the 1st half of a well-known proverb and asked them to come up with the remainder of the proverb. It’s hard to believe these were actually done by first graders. Their insight may surprise you. While reading, keep in mind that these are first-graders, 6-year-olds, because the last one is a classic!
1. Don’t change horses…. until they stop running.
2. Strike while the…. bug is close.
3. It’s always darkest before…. Daylight Saving Time.
4. Never underestimate the power of…. termites.
5. You can lead a horse to water but…. How?
6. Don’t bite the hand that…. looks dirty.
7. No news is…. impossible.
8. A miss is as good as a…. Mr.
9. You can’t teach an old dog new …. Math
10. If you lie down with dogs, you’ll…. stink in the morning.
11. Love all, trust…. Me.
12. The pen is mightier than the…. pigs.
13. An idle mind is…. the best way to relax.
14. Where there’s smoke there’s…. pollution.
15. Happy the bride who…. gets all the presents.
16. A penny saved is…. not much.
17. Two’s company, three’s…. the Musketeers.
18. Don’t put off till tomorrow what…. you put on to go to bed.
19. Laugh and the whole world laughs with you, cry and…. You have to blow your nose.
20. There are none so blind as…. Stevie Wonder.
21. Children should be seen and not…. spanked or grounded.
22. If at first you don’t succeed…. get new batteries.
23. You get out of something only what you…. See in the picture on the box
24. When the blind lead the blind…. get out of the way.
25. A bird in the hand…. is going to poop on you.
And the WINNER is…
26. Better late than ….. Pregnant